Neurodivergence, the bigger the success the bigger the meltdowns?

I work with many successful neurodivergent professionals. 

A common issue that many are wanting help with is how to manage overwhelm.

For some this is an internal shutdown when things feel like too much. For others it is outward and explosive. 

The fallout of these big responses is often shame, guilt, embarrassment and a worry that these are a permanent fixture in life. 

These experiences can cause issues in relationships and at work, as there is a need to keep these hidden, masked from the world.

Another common element is the struggle to verbally express what is going on when this happens. Words go offline and others are left clueless as to why this very competent person is behaving almost like a child.

Success does not have to mean more of these experiences, however without awareness, understanding of ourselves and compassion they could be a constant.

So how do we manage such intensity, when the outside world is looking to us to lead, perform, get stuff done?

I see clients shift by doing the following:

Awareness (tune in to what is going on when this happens, triggers)

Validation (through a neurodivergent lens)

Compassion (for ourselves managing so much in systems that are designed for one neurotype)

Expression through different methods (not everything is about verbal communication or feelings)

Inner safety (finding an anchor within, even when it all feels unstable)

Choices (finding different responses, physical outlets, sensory soothing)

I have seen many ADHD and autistic clients move from shame to understanding, guilt to compassion and with a unique set of strategies designed by themselves for themselves.

You are not broken, you are struggling to manage what feels too much. 

With some gentle shifts, there can be confidence in how to manage what currently feels too big to share. 

(Watch this space for a programme of webinars to share many of the tools, processes and exercises used in sessions with clients.)

#autism #adhd #neurodivergence #meltdowns #overwhelm